Getting over relationship cheating, while not impossible, will be very difficult, the first thing you need to do is determine why the infidelity happened in the first place and whether or not it’s likely to only be a one time thing. If the answer to that question is ‘no’ than it’s probably time to move on and end the relationship.
If you’re involved with someone who is a ‘serial’ cheater, they will never change. It’s best to make a break right now before you get even more hurt. If, on the other hand, your partner has always been committed and faithful and only strayed because of some extenuating circumstances, you may have a chance of making your relationship work…if they want to work on it too.
It’s important for you to realize though, that even if you are both totally committed to making the relationship work it will still be an uphill climb. It’s just not that easy to learn to trust someone after they’ve betrayed you, even if you really want to.
And if the person who cheated isn’t 100% committed to addressing the issues that led to the cheating and willing to work on fixing them, the relationship is dead. One partner can’t do all the work to fix the relationship, it has to be a joint effort or it will fail.
Most couples will need to rely on an objective third party for help, such as a counselor or clergy. There are a lot of intense emotions to sort through and having an objective bystander who can ‘referee’ and keep each party on track and not let it dissolve into a shouting match, can go a long way to finding a resolution and possibly even salvaging the relationship.
Sometimes the relationship simply can’t be, or shouldn’t be, saved. Many times people get together for the wrong reasons such as loneliness or the need to feel secure. When that is the basis of a relationship instead of love, friendship, and respect, it’s going to be virtually impossible to save it after an infidelity. If this is the situation a counselor can also be helpful in helping both parties find closure, heal and move on.
If you find that you tend to get into a lot of relationships with the wrong types of people, a counselor can also help you figure out why you have the tendency to be self destructive. Whether or not people want to admit it, any time they find themselves involved with the wrong person it’s almost always apparent very early in the relationship that the two of them simply aren’t that compatible.
Most people will ignore these warning signs and then act surprised later when things fall apart. If you can avoid these types of relationships in the first place, you’ll save yourself a lot of heartache in the long run.
Overcoming relationship cheating is possible, as long as both parties are really willing to work on it. Just remember to always be honest about the overall worth of the relationship and whether or not it really is something that should be salvaged or not.
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